Dagger Kris
Dagger Kris
Rate my poem?
It was an assingment for English Class. Btw ‘kris’ is a type of dagger.
Tell the truth but tell it slant
And use the utmost care,
For pure truth can be as deadly
As Medusa’s stare.
Truth can be as water,
Clear, refreshing, pure;
Yet if it comes alone
Can it really cure?
Blind is he who hears no lies,
Ignorance is bliss;
Truth is greatest knowledge
Yet deadly as the kris.
I love it! Though I think it would read better with an adjective for Medusa’s stare…..Medusa’s (stony, rigid, dreaded) stare.
Same with ‘Can it really cure?’ That line is less sophisticated then the rest of your poem. You could make an early reference to the kris with something like…
Yet when it comes alone
Beware it’s two-edged cure!
Since you have ‘he’ who hears no lies, how about
ignorant is ‘his’ bliss.
Ever notice how easy it is to tweak someone else’s poem? 
Thus
Tell the truth…but tell it slant
And use the utmost care
For pure truth oft is deadly
As Medusa’s stony stare
Truth can be as water,
Clear, refreshing, pure;
Yet when it comes alone
Beware it’s two-edged cure!
Blind is he who hears no lies,
Ignorant is his bliss
Truth is greatest knowledge
…Yet deadly as a kris
Your poem is absolutely great, I only spent time with it because I like it so. I want to encourage you and give you ideas because you have so much to offer, keep writing. (And I hope you received a well earned, top grade).
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